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The Scrapyard Gallery
Just like the little devil on Tony Hart's shoulder (no I don't mean Andi Peters!)
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Tom Hunter
The Darkest Recesses of the Mini Clan
I really can't disagree!
- Morris Ital - Do I really need to offer an explanation, M'Lud? Frightening, truly frightening. Really, I was scared of this car as a kid. Whoever thought tarting up a Marina was a good idea should be locked up in Carstairs. Then again, they probably have. A monstrosity.
- Ford Orion (circa 1986-1990) - Shite. Utter, utter shite. Escort in saloon form - woo-hoo! 1.4E model tarted up with a flimsy boot spoiler (£7.99 from Automagic or some-such Motoring Accessory Outlet) plus three-spoke alloys and static electricity conductors hanging off its arse was the chosen weapon of Falkirk's resident boy-racing dickheads for a while. And for that reason alone, all remaining examples should be sent to the crusher.
- Austin Montego - I once passed a silver 'MG' Montego on the M9. It had (and I kid you not) furry dice, leopard-print seats, a chrome coke-can style exhaust trim hanging off a very rattly exhaust and those L.E.D. indicator/brakelight things that sit inside back windows.But best of all, plastered across the back window was a HUGE sticker that read: 'The Montego Touch'. I laughed so hard I nearly crashed.
- Vauxhall Nova - 'Vauxhall Nova' is almost an anagram of 'Tremendous Pile of Undiluted Effluent'
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